REBUILDING SEVERED RELATIONSHIPS

AKA KIDS WHO SIDE WITH THE ABUSER By the time children pull away from their mothers, they’re profoundly wounded. They wouldn’t pull away otherwise. On a deep level they desperately want to be close to her. Those loving feelings may be buried under huge piles of emotional injury, but they’re still there. They distanced themselves…

WHY I WROTE “IN CUSTODY”

NOTE: The first 30 pages of In Custody are now free for anyone to read. Go to the book’s website, InCustodyTheNovel.com, and click on “Read Chapters 1-5.” I’ll give the short answer first. I wanted something we could hand to people who don’t get it. I wanted to be able to tell them that the…

THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS TO KNOW ABOUT NARCISSISM

I’ve promised to write a second part to my post about the difference between narcissists and abusers. But I decided that first I need to explain a number of key concepts regarding severe self-centeredness, also called “narcissism” or “personality disorder.” So that’s what I’m exploring today. I’m not writing here about abusive men. I’m writing…

TIME TO SPEAK BLUNTLY ABOUT THE FAMILY COURTS

   It’s time to say the obvious truth straight up. No pretty ribbons, no proving how “reasonable” I am by sugar-coating the harsh reality of what’s actually happening.      Here it is:  The family court system across the continent has become the moral equivalent of a slave trade. Mothers and children have no rights at…

KEY SIGNS OF A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP

KEY SIGNS OF A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP Over the years, many people have said to me, “Lists exist out there of warning signs of an abusive partner – which is good to have – but what are the signs of the opposite? How do I know when I’m in a healthy relationship?” Here are some ideas…

Lundy Bancroft | Blog

Ever Wonder Why Your Abusive Partner Hates You?

(This tirade is a little different from the more measured writing you may be accustomed to from me, so take  a deep breath. The piece is in two parts, both of which are below.)   Part 1 The abusive man learns early in life, from his surrounding society and beyond, that when he becomes an…